Tuesday, April 29, 2008


/haiytess/ noun (pl. hiatuses) a pause or gap in continuity
ORIGIN Latin, 'gaping'.

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. While I've been away, the power struggle which has gripped the Crab nebula for millenia finally tipped into the favour of the freedom fighters, and a new generation of methane-breathers now live in an age of hardship led by a libertarian for a change. Andromeda has accepted sweeping reforms; it is now illegal to eat your young there. Never before has a single law polarised an entire galaxy. Closer to home, the android Klaxon Bell has taken his 100,000,000th victim, baffling police with his ability to shift between alternative universes at will. Several Humans from our planet are currently helping Zeta Rectuli 'Grey' law enforcement agents with their enquiries, but the investigation seems to have hit a stone wall as few of our species keep our memory glands in our anuses.

I was away from the Solar System for only a few hours while I saw all this, but back on Earth a few months passed. Our carer civilization, the one that makes sure no big rocks sweep in and smash us while we're not looking, still hasn't found a way to accelerate our water-laden bodies past light-speed. I've spent the last day or so catching up on current affairs, so to have something relevant to blog about. I know how uninteresting interstellar wars are to you all.

1. Overlord Rudd

Using new technology to rewind time, Kevin Rudd has found prohibition is unpopular

2. Little People Still Rock our Socks Off

Mutants prevail on prime time TV because midgets are allowed to be belly dancers. You'll have to search for those photos yourself, you dirty, dirty man.

3. Cthulhu Lives!

That is not dead which can eternal lie, and with stranger aeons even death may die.

Eat me Emperor Xenu.

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